12:45 AM - Tuesday, May 19, 2009
its almost 1am and i still haven't showered yet =/ i know la, i'm so dirty. but its just that i'm
rushing with my law assignment, that i have to complete by tmr cos tmr's the tutorial =/ ugh!
school was ok today i guess. had FPATH test today, guess it wasn't so bad but i'm hoping that i'll at least be able to get a pass, even though i didn't bother studying for it =/ i feel so lazyyyyy. plus there's PUO test tmr, which i'm totally not interested in studying for. blahblahblah! i'm kinda looking forward to law actually, she's a very nice teacher, plus she's extremely slack! :)
then i shld be going home after school bcos my baby's working afternoon shift tmr, wednesday as well. i'll miss him very much :( thursday he'll be staying over bcos my dad's not in the country, yipee! :) hehe. just hope adam's mom will let him stay over bcos its been an extremely long time since he last stayed over, i've always been staying over at his place, not that i'm complaining :)
gosh, i should get into the shower. i feel so sticky and grimy. was super broke today =/ only had $4 plus to settle my own dinner. nvm, tmr and wednesday i'll save money cos i wouldn't be going out. sighhhh. i wish i had a job. or i wish school paid me to study, life would be much easier that way! won't it?
i'm still feeling kinda down, from what happened the past few days. i really need to keep my mind occupied or i'd start thinking stupid thoughts. i know i have the support of all my friends, plus Adam's family as well. but i can't be so complacent that this won't happen again. and who knows, he might be going by the "what she doesn't know won't hurt her" logic. i'm really scared. i don't know i feel extremely threatened. i've never felt this way before. maybe bcos i feel that someone's better than me... i feel extremely lousy.
k then, think a hot shower should do the trick. and i guess i'll just sleep on it. managed to fall asleep last night even though i was so tempted to cry, ha. i feel so loserish, like really. no self confidence, like i'm fucking stupid & useless. you know the feeling? i guess no one really understands till they actually go through it.
okok enough of this shit. and i don't want Adam speaking her name in front of me. just makes my blood boil & yes, i do hate her with a passion. goodnight world :)
